Totally Mundane

After yesterday's sock fire, today seems to be settling in quietly for a change (which is the only reason I am able to write another entry within 24 hours of the last one). Nobody has gotten hurt, sick, or started anything aflame!

Consider it the quiet before the storm though because this weekend, we are finally transforming this (and it's not going to be pretty, well, in the end I hope it will be, but the before and during process...not so much):

Our "very much in need of something different" bedroom

This is our bedroom, which has pretty much looked this way since we moved in during the Autumn of 2007. The furniture is from my Grandma, probably from the 1940s or 50s which I love, but it's really distressed and my husband hates it that the paint is chipping off. I cannot part with it though so it's going into our girls' bedroom, maybe someday I will repaint it.

The lady who owned our house for 50 plus years was in her 90s when she passed away (right before we bought the home) and I think she had the same curtains for almost as long. They have charm to them (if you could see them up close you'd see the cute songbirds and leaves- all in brown) but again, Hubster cannot stand them. I will probably try to recycle the fabric for something as it's really good, heavy fabric- the kind you can't find anymore not to mention be able to afford in today's economic climate.

Built-in shelves are really cool, but as you can see mine are totally unorganized (anyone who knows me will know that I really am unorganized but seem to be able to find everything still without trouble). Organization is a goal of mine though, in every part of my life- so the shelves will be a good place to start.

The Englishman wanted to paint the room a dark royal blue, but as you can maybe see through our open bedroom door, our living room (which is gigantic) is a deep orchid blue/purple color which is beautiful, but dark enough to please Dracula. So I wanted something cheerier for the bedroom....I'm not afraid of bold colors, just don't want anymore dark colors. So we're going with apple green and white.

What is paying for this? A work bonus that we weren't expecting, but are very happy and blessed to have received (despite the lack of pay raise we are truly lucky to even have a job)! We are doing it on the cheap- Ikea here we come (for some new bedroom furniture)! But hopefully it'll be enough to lighten every one's moods around here- it's been a hard year. And hopefully the job will continue to be secure, otherwise it'll be a big waste of money....personally I'd save this money for a billion other things, but since it's his bonus money, he gets the final say. I cannot argue that I find it endearing that he cares about having a nice bedroom to relax in and look at.

Here's to hoping we get through the weekend without a major catastrophe...and that the green turns out the shade we hope it will.... it's my favorite color in the entire world, but know it can backfire. Fingers crossed. I will post some after pictures when we are done, if I survive the adventure!

Kaboom: Story of an almost house fire

This week certainly started with a bang and hasn't let up. First of all, the kids, OK, my son opened the door onto my head the other day at full speed and I had a huge bump, now a nice green bruise that really hurts. But that's OK, nothing I can't live with. It's good to have some sense literally knocked into one's head now and again right? Another count-your-many-blessings moments happened this morning but it could have been a lot more disastrous than having one's head hit with a door.

This morning....a sock caught on fire. Yep, one little sock that almost burned the entire house down. It's a long story. But basically, because I dry my clothes on the line and do not own a dryer (and they are often still not dry the next morning with the cold weather), I sometimes throw a pair of socks in the microwave for say, one minute to warm them up for whomsoever's tootsies they will be covering.

Well, I did that this morning.....put a pair of the husband's socks in for one minute to warm up and I heard the timer go off and I just left them in there to sit for a moment. It sounds weird, I know, but it works (and I even put them on a plate just like food).

I went outside to bring in the rest of the socks to finish warming up in the house during the day, and I walked in to a house full of smoke and the kids saying "what is that smell?" Mr. Awesome (aka the husband) was running around looking for something on fire. He found it- in the shoe and sock basket.

A sock, like a glowing ember, smoking and literally singed with fiery red holes with the fibres burning and spreading, smoking more and more and growing into a flame. I grabbed the sock and carried it to the sink, turned the water on full blast and then drowned it in a full sink.

Mr. Awesome probably would have kept holding the burning sock until it caught his hand on fire- he one time set himself on fire in England while lighting a barbecue but that's a story for another day. He likes fire....a little too much and so do a lot of other English people I observed while living in England. There is a town not far from where we lived where people run through the streets carrying barrels on fire! I have no idea why; I should find it on Wikipedia.

Anyway, I'm guessing Lilz pushed the "quick on" button on the microwave again and started the socks smoking....and then she took them out and put them in the basket by the front door (she's really into putting things where they go) and once the oxygen/air hit the almost on fire sock it actually started to catch on fire. If we hadn't found it when we did the whole basket would have caught on fire....it was starting to burn a hole in the basket, and who knows from there what could have happened.

The basket with the little burned hole

I'm posting some photos to show all of this...because it almost sounds made up. But seriously, this is how life goes in our house. There's never a dull moment! It reminds of the time last year when Lilz put a plastic plate from her tea set in our real oven (I had no idea it was in there), I went to turn it on to bake a cake, the plastic melted and set on fire and we had to call the firemen for the first of many times now.

What remains of a once white sock

This morning after the sock on fire incident, Mr. Awesome said to us, "you guys are determined to burn this house down aren't you?" Ummm, no, we just have a very imaginative little girl who mommy obviously needs to watch like a hawk a little bit more.....because she of course must have inherited the pyromaniac gene from her British pyromaniac father. The microwave is now going to be unplugged unless in actual use by the way.

All I can say in closing is...thank goodness for small miracles.

Perspective...

is something I have decided that I quickly lose sight of when I'm sick or in pain or hurt (for a shining example: see my entry right before this one where I did out-whined my 3 year old). Now that the antibiotics have kicked in and I don't feel like I have a knife stuck in the side of my throat I can see clearly again. I am glad it's Monday which is the opposite of most people. The weekend was good, and bad, kinda how it goes sometimes, but all in all I'm just glad to be out of pain and once again, really happy to be alive experiencing everything that comes my way (even if it makes me cry like certain events that made me weep yesterday....think of The Gift of the Magi story by O Henry gone awry). So, I see Monday as a fresh start- the way most people see the first day of the new year, I feel it a blessing to start a new week and leave any of the previous week's hardships in the dust.

When I think about people who are in constant pain and learn to handle it with a smile on their face (a real one), I am in total awe. Like so many of the young children I've been privileged to get to know this past year who have been assaulted by cancer- a nephew and a niece (not related) of high school friends. One of whom already lost his sweet young life to cancer and the other, a beautiful little girl who is still battling her fight. If they can smile through their pain then certainly I, as a grown up, can too.

Then you can take my grandmother for another example who I had a really great conversation with yesterday on the phone. Despite being in kidney failure and having recently fallen out of bed and being all bruised up, she shared the most wickedly funny stories with me with that same sense of humor that she has had for 85 years no matter what was thrown her way.

I'm grateful for the constant reminders from those who are so much stronger and braver than I am. They are the best teachers in the world....and boy do I have so much more learning to do. I'm learning that patience and perspective are two totally different things, I once upon a time believed because I was patient that's all that mattered, but am now realizing that keeping things positive during turmoil is what really counts. Having the patience of a Saint doesn't equate to happiness, but finding the meaning during trials does. Next time I get so sick I promise not to whine (cry, maybe).... I will hand all the whining off to my children to take care of (since they, as children are allowed).

Sick

...of being sick. That's me. I just got home from the doctor and I have strep throat, a sinus infection and an ear infection on top of the pesky thyroid tumor which is running my entire immune system down. Oh, and for pure joy I get to go get something done called a Thyroid Up Take Scan (they now want to do that before they will do a biopsy....they seem to have to do every ultrasound now known to man before actually testing the tissue). Our co-pay went up and they took an hour just to get me in the room (glad I picked the kids up early from school to take them with me) because they couldn't find my chart and then they couldn't find me in my insurance company's system. And they want to do more blood testing but they wouldn't do it today because I'm too sick....so I get to go back next week after I'm done with the anti-biotics. I would like a new body now please and thank you. I know it could be so much worse, but I just want to cry. I'm only 33 and feel about 100. The fun part (for real)? The kids blew up the medical gloves (well, I blew up the medical gloves) and played doctor....my son's was an alien of course, and my youngest one made hers a chicken. My oldest decided to deflate her gloves and play doctor this time. She said the alien had a skull fracture and the chicken's knees had infections....and she promptly looked in her medical book (i.e. Martha Stewart Living) for which medicines they all needed. My son sat and studied the anatomy books like they were the coolest thing ever. So all in all, if one of them becomes inspired to be a doctor or nurse, this will have been well worth it. Maybe they'll be the ones to finally heal me. :-)

Baby Number One

Mimi, whale watching, Dana Point, California Summer 07

Most of you are probably on Facebook with me so I apologize that this is a repeat- but I thought it was awesome thinking back to Mimi's birth almost 9 years ago. It's made me all nostalgic, so am turning it into a journal entry here on my blog. Just to explain- the reason I didn't want to tell Justin first is because we were living in a basement and he was working nights, we had just moved from England to Arizona and a baby was a bit of a shocker. Turns out though that he was soooo excited (obviously) and the day Mimi was born is the only day I've seen him actually cry (he teared up with the other two but not the streaming kind of tears like the day he held his firstborn daughter...my favorite memory ever). What a blessing it is to be a mother, whether we give birth or adopt or just nuture any child when others cannot or will not....it certainly is a miracle to behold. This morning, as I tried to comfort our now almost 9 year old first born begging me if she could stay home from school (because she's having trouble making a new best friend at her new school), I remembered so vividly holding her as a newborn, crying with colic pains and rocking her for hours, but being filled with joy to hear the screams because it meant that I was a mother. I would do almost anything to turn back the clock and go back to those days...it's true what they say, children grow up way too fast.

First Born Survey
Here you go mommies - a different kind of survey for a change - it's all about your first born! Just copy and paste it in a new note for yourself! Then tag some mommy friends! Let's see how much you remember!


1. WAS YOUR FIRST PREGNANCY PLANNED? Nope, I was on the pill and went sand boarding when I was about a month along and didn't know (and threw myself off a sand dune).


2. WERE YOU MARRIED AT THE TIME? Yes


3. WHAT WERE YOUR REACTIONS? Absolute wonderment and fright all rolled up together.


4. WAS ABORTION AN OPTION FOR YOU? Never


5. HOW OLD WERE YOU? 24


6. HOW DID YOU FIND OUT YOU WERE PREGNANT? I started having morning sickness morning, noon and night


7. WHO DID YOU TELL FIRST? Tricia or Tatiana, anyone but Justin


8. DID YOU WANT TO FIND OUT THE SEX? Yes, I found out on my birthday it was a girl


9. DUE DATE? 2 May 2000


10. DID YOU HAVE MORNING SICKNESS? on and off all day for a few weeks


11. WHAT DID YOU CRAVE? Papa John's plain bread sticks


12. WHO/WHAT IRRITATED YOU THE MOST? The pitocin drip to actually start the contractions- thought I was dying


13. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CHILD'S SEX? girl


14. DID YOU WISH YOU HAD THE OPPOSITE SEX OF WHAT YOU WERE GETTING? No


15. HOW MANY POUNDS DID YOU GAIN THROUGHOUT THE PREGNANCY? 10, I was so sick that I was skinnier after I gave birth than before (can't say the same for the rest of my babies)


16. DID YOU HAVE A BABY SHOWER? Yes


17. WAS IT A SURPRISE OR DID YOU KNOW? i knew


18. DID YOU HAVE ANY COMPLICATIONS DURING YOUR PREGNANCY? yes, she was late and the meconium leaked- when my water broke it was neon green.


19. WHERE DID YOU GIVE BIRTH? Chandler regional Hospital


20. HOW MANY HOURS WERE YOU IN LABOR? i arrived at the hospital around 2am and she was born at 5pm, so that was 15 hours just at the hospital but it was longer than that if you add in the home time. i pushed for 3 hours straight


21. WHO WAS THERE WHEN YOU GAVE BIRTH? Justin, the doctors and nurses and my mom somewhere


22. WAS IT NATURAL OR C-SECTION? Natural, my epidural had worn off because they wanted me to "feel" what i was doing- nice eh?


23. DID YOU TAKE MEDICINE TO EASE THE PAIN? For a while yes


24. HOW MUCH DID YOUR CHILD WEIGH? 6 lbs. 13 oz.


25.WHEN WAS YOUR CHILD ACTUALLY BORN? 5 PM on the dot, 9 May 2000, Dave Gahan's birthday which my sister was very excited about


26. HOW OLD IS YOUR FIRST BORN TODAY? 8 going on 80, she's an old soul like her mom.

Some Days

Let's be honest, some days are really, really not the best (even if we are grateful for every day we have in life). Things could always been worse though, which is something I like to always tell myself (a billion times over) when I have a bad day. But, if life had a rewind button I'm sure many of us would use it. Wouldn't you? Or am I wrong? Maybe I should create a poll on that. Yesterday was a day like that for me, today hasn't been much better....although I haven't managed to upset someone (not that I know of) today yet so that has one up on yesterday.

To that certain someone that I love very much who I kinda missed completely at the light rail station last night (despite driving around looking and subsequently that certain someone feeling like he'd been forgotten and then walking home 2 miles only to be locked out of the house wondering where if his wife and 3 children had been car-jacked, kidnapped or killed in an accident), all I can say is....forgive me. There's nothing quite like a self-esteem killer than disappointing the person you're meant to make happy. Those are the days I want to go live in a dark cave and not come out but that's a rather defeatist attitude as my husband would point out.

So, that was last night, and then today my body of course let me down, again. If my body were an actual seperate person, I don't think I'd like her very much....I'm glad my inner-spirit isn't as hard as my body is on myself (if that makes sense). I ended up with yet another medical situation that came somewhat out of the blue that landed me promptly in the doctor's office around 1pm this afternoon. I'll be ok, and I'll spare you the gory, boring details....but it is something that makes me as a mother a little sad and also a good reminder of how fragile life is. I'll let you use your imagination. No, nobody told me I only have 4 weeks left to live THANK goodness.

My lesson learned from the past 48 hours is just how quickly life can change. I guess that yesterday maybe we could have been killed in a car crash (rather than just missing our Englishman at the station...or maybe he could have just as easily gotten hurt along the way home), or today at the doctor as hard as it was, could have been worse (there I go with my age old adage again).

As much as I'd like to erase certain mistakes I make, I wouldn't ever want to not be here to mess up royally because how else can we learn to be better (or in my case at least try to be) or fully appreciate life and all sides of it? I'm still mad at myself for making my husband full of fear last night, but sure am glad we are both still here to keep each other company. With that being said, if anyone finds a remote control where I can rewind yesterday....let me know because I still would have rather not upset anyone at all, ever.

Ode to...

.......Mr. Tanner.

Place: Dobson High, Mr. Turner's math class
Date: 1994
What: Inspiring Words that have never left me

Sometime this past week my oldest daughter decided to go through a box of my papers from high school and of course, they ended up scattered through out the house. Are you shocked? What else would my kids do with a box of my papers? It's a rule to throw them all over the place like a NYC ticker tape parade! She also had fun laughing at my old yearbooks and wondering why I wasn't a cheerleader, or should say scolding me for not being one.

So on Saturday I was hoovering (UK)/vacuuming (US) and my amazing new hoover (which actually works and does what it should) grabbed the corner of a paper sticking out from underneath my daughter's bedroom door into the hallway. See photo proof of how the piece of paper was almost completely destroyed.

I turned off the hoover and rescued the paper, of course I didn't know what it was but I never keep anything that isn't important so figured it was a birth certificate, or a first drawing or something equally as crucial.

But ironically it was actually something I was thinking about after I wrote my last entry about dreams. When I started asking in my last journal entry to start pondering about what happiness was, this paper was one thing that actually popped into my own mind. On this piece of paper were printed words that offered my younger self an early glimpse into what happiness should be, and from what sources it would never come from. As an adult the words mean more to me than they probably ever did to the 17 year old version of myself who originally held this piece of paper in her hands- an earlier version of myself who thought that by age 33 years old (a-hem, in other words by now) life would certainly be perfectly blissful all day every day, 24/7/365. This piece of paper contains some of the most awesome advice that a high school student could have ever hoped to receive- it is Mr. Tanner's "first day of math class" note.

For the record, I was, and am and will be forever more dreadful at math. If it weren't for my fear of math I would have become an oceanographer, or nurse, or architect, or any number of things that I wanted to be had it not been for my math struggles growing up. One time I even had a math teacher in junior high tell me that the left side of my brain must not have fully developed (at least he got fired for saying something so rude....I was a straight A student aside from math, but not because the left side of my brain never developed)!

I thought I would dislike Mr. Tanner based on the fact that I disliked math. Ended up I really liked him as a human being though and here is why, based on what he said to us in his note which reads:

"What is your passion? What is your dream? What drives you to accomplish that which no one else has? To be willing to stand up and make a difference in a society where people fear to be different? Are you one step ahead or one step behind the crowd? We cannot afford to waste our precious days for they will vanish as quickly as they come.

Will you be ordinary or extraordinary? Excellence has a price tag and many refuse to pay it.

Do you have a voice? Then speak out in the appropriate time. Use wisdom to guide your passion and reams to speak out that which burns in your soul. Let your tongue be set on fire to those words which are righteous and true.

Do you believe you were created for a purpose? Then set your sights on the things above and focus all your passion on that dream until you fulfill your destiny.

Will you be like the majority or the minority? Even if you lost everything but your life, your faith is more important than anything the world has to offer. Don't trade it in or pawn it off when times get tough or for the temporal pleasures of the world.

Never settle for second best for it will leave you like the rest. Easy paths are seldom fulfilling and often make crooked men. Take risks and soar above everyone else. Remember one final note. In all that you accomplish, keep your motives pure and never seek position or prestige. For by doing so you will the world by the motivation of love."

I don't know if Mr. Tanner actually wrote this, or if someone else did and he just loved the words as much as I do...but either way, I will always attribute it to him until I know someone else actually wrote it. My favorite line is about the idea of losing everything- and how faith is the one thing you can live with even with nothing else in the world. Maybe it's not just faith, but definitely love, family, friends and humanity of course. In this day and age, many of us are learning what is really important...the economy is stealing everything away from many of us. Suddenly the latest fashions, coolest gadgets and a brand new car every other year are things that many of us just cannot afford anymore, well, unless we don't want to put food on the table.

Mr. Tanner's note says it all to me really. Things in the end are nothing. Your outlook and the people you surround yourself with are really all that you can take with you in the end....and even if you don't believe you can take it with you (I do but know not everyone does), these are still the things that really make life worth living. It's probably illegal nowadays for a teacher to hand something like this out to students, sadly. Even if now, the state of the paper itself makes it look like could care less, the truth is that it's one of my prized possessions. I wonder if Mr. Tanner is still at Dobson?